


Open your Eyes

by CubbieBear



Category: The Black Tapes Podcast
Genre: F/M, Light Angst, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-09
Updated: 2017-08-31
Packaged: 2018-10-16 16:16:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10574916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CubbieBear/pseuds/CubbieBear
Summary: A continuation of "Put my Future in You". Alex and Dr. Strand work through their situation.





	1. Just Say Yes

Six hours later, Strand texted Alex to let her know he had landed at Sea-Tac. While waiting for her to pick him up, he rehearsed what he would say. He wanted to be sure she understood where he stood regarding the situation. He had been in such a state of panic that he didn’t realize until settled on the plane that his very brief and terse response to Alex’s proclamation would leave doubt as to his general feelings on the situation. He had the entire flight to obsess over every detail of the last two months-and prior- and only had more and more questions that he needed answered…but first he needed to be sure Alex knew where he stood.

After a short wait, Alex pulled up to meet him. Strand stowed his small carry-on and briefcase into the back seat and then folded his tall frame into the passenger seat of Alex’s small car.

“Hello, Alex.”

“Hello, Richard.” Strand had so much to say in his head, but now that she was here, in front of him, he didn’t know where to start. “How was your flight?” Alex asked, seemingly content to focus on small talk instead of addressing the elephant in the car.

“Fine… it was fine.” Strand sighed. “Alex, I…”

“Dr. Strand, I’d really prefer to wait to have any kind of heavy conversation until I’m not driving. I thought I’d take you to your father’s house…unless you wanted to talk at the studio instead?”

“The house is fine; although, I’m sure there’s nothing in the way of dinner or drinks there.” 

“That’s alright,” Alex answered, “I picked up some of that jasmine green tea you like and some juice for myself, and we can order some food if need be.”

“Right…right”. Strand was at a loss as to how to interact with Alex when she seemed so calm and in control of the situation, when he felt anything but. They drove the rest of the short distance to Stand’s father’s house in silence with just the sounds of faint classical music playing from the car’s speakers. 

Once at the house, Strand stowed his bags in the bedroom and joined Alex in the kitchen. She was standing at the sink staring out the window, seemingly lost in thought, when he entered the room. He just watched her until she was broken from her reverie by the whistling of the kettle she must have put on for his tea. She moved to turn off the water, but Strand stopped her. 

“I’ll take care of that, Alex, Why don’t you go sit at the table, and I’ll finish this.” She just nodded her head and went to sit down; for the first time, Strand noticed how tired and weary she seemed but decided that discussion could wait as there were more important matters at hand to discuss.

When they were both finally settled, it seemed Alex had decided not to put the inevitable off any longer. “Look, Richard. I understand that you want to do what you think is the right thing here, but, honestly, I just thought that you should know. You are not obligated to me, and I’m not expecting anything from you; you have your own life and issues that you are working through. Plus, with everything that’s been going on…”, she trailed off, not needing to rehash the craziness of the last year. Strand realizes that Alex has no idea of his true feelings on the matter, that she doesn’t know the reasons he has flown across the country at a moment’s notice. Of course, he couldn’t blame her; he hadn’t really made any effort to make her understand at this point.

He starts,“Alex, I…” but before he can get out the words, she cuts him off.

“Please don’t say anything. Like I said, you are under no obligation, and I already have everything figured out.”

“What does that mean? You have everything figured out.” he questions.

“At least for the short-term I do. Terry and Paul are really good about maternity leave, I've got my apartment and my parents will come up to help once I get towards my due date and then after, and...,” she takes a deep breathe because she knows this next piece of information will not be received well, “I think I should tell people it’s Nic’s.”

He is so stunned that he doesn’t know how to respond. “What?”

“I think it’s the best solution; it’s believable…Nic and I are close friends and spend a lot of time together. People won’t question it. He’s already agreed to it if that’s what I want.“

“Why would you want to do that?”

“Come on, Richard. After everything that’s happened, the Cult of Tiamat obviously believes that your blood line holds some key to whatever they were planning and since nothing has seemingly happened since everything went down, I’m sure they are at least plotting their next steps. Even if this apocalypse talk is nonsense, these people we’ve been dealing certainly don’t believe that. What if they, or any of the other people we’ve encountered, get it in their minds that this child has some role to play. I don’t want anything to put the baby in danger. By taking you out of the equation, hopefully that will dispel any interest in the baby. I can’t think of what I want anymore; I have to do what’s best here; I know we didn't plan this, but I love our child, and I have to think of them first now, regardless of what I want for myself.”

In his state of shock, Strand defaults to his standard line while trying to gather his thoughts, “There is no apocalypse coming.”

“But what about the cult? Even if nothing supernatural is going on, those people are real, as you well know, and they can do real damage.”

Her little speech gives him the time he needs to gather his thoughts. “I will keep you and our child safe. I know I don’t have the best track record, but I swear to you that I will do everything in my power to keep you safe. This is my child too, Alex. I want…no I need to be here to support you and our baby. I know that I may not seem like the most paternal or warmest person, but I have feelings just like anyone else. When you told me that you were pregnant, I wasn’t thinking about how this would disrupt my admittedly empty life or what those lunatics in the cult are planning; all I felt was joy and love and protectiveness over this new life…this piece of you and me.” In a small voice so that she barely hears him, “Please don’t take that away from me. After everything else, I couldn’t bear it.”

Alex had steeled herself for accusations and anger but not this vulnerability. “I don’t want to take our child away from you. Can't you see how this is killing me too...but I'm scared...of a lot of things.”

“I'm scared too, Alex, but we need to face this together. I want this,” he stares straight into her eyes so that she can see his emotion and sincerity, “I want this--the baby, you, everything. I am here for you...if you want me.”


	2. My swollen heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex tries to process Strand's declaration, and Strand does his best to take care of Alex.

After his announcement, Strand could see that Alex was struggling; she was clearly exhausted and was wrestling with this new information he dumped on her.

“Alex, I can see that you need some time and some rest so please at least just stay the night. It is starting to get late, and I’m not entirely comfortable with you driving home alone at this point. I promise that I am not expecting anything or an answer tonight, but at least stay so that I can be sure you are alright.”

Alex’s mind was racing with this new information. Part of her desperately wanted to believe Strand—that he wanted everything…with her –but the larger part of her still believed that Strand was just saying what he thought he should because he felt obligated to her and the baby, and all the what ifs and outside influences would also seek to further complicate any solution they tried to reach together. In that moment, it was all too much to consider. “You’re right; I do need some time, but it has been a very long day, and I really need to just get some sleep and then maybe we can revisit this….tomorrow. How long are you planning to stay in town anyway?”

“Indefinitely,” Stand decisively answered.

Instead of addressing this new landmine, Alex just nodded and trudged upstairs to the guest room. 

After tidying up, Strand realized that neither he nor Alex had eaten any dinner. After searching through the sparse cabinets, he managed to find a couple cans of soup and some saltines that hadn’t expired yet. He quickly made the soup and took a steaming bowl along with a plate of crackers up to Alex’s room. He rapped quietly on the guest room door. With no answer, he knocked a little louder and then turned the knob, softly calling Alex’s name. Hearing no response, he opened the door fully to see Alex asleep in the bed—still in the clothes she had picked him up in, even though he was sure that she had some extra clothes stashed in the room somewhere. The blankets had been pushed down and were tangled around her feet—a clear sign that Alex’s sleep had not been restful; Strand wondered if her insomnia and sleep issues had abated at all while he had been gone.

He set down the tray on the bedside table and silently pulled the sheet and quilt back over Alex. She sighed and turned onto her side towards the edge of the mattress, more fully facing Strand where he stood next to the bed.

Strand knew that he may not get another opportunity like this for a long time, if ever, and took his time scanning and mapping Alex in his mind. With the moonlight streaming in through the sheer curtains, he thought that she had never looked more beautiful or serene. He reached over to push some hair that had fallen over her forehead and eyes back, lightly trailed his hand down her face and then briefly clasped her hand with his. He closed his eyes and savored the moment, etching the feeling in his mind. As he started to let go to leave her in peace for the night, she lighted gripped his hand in her sleep and mumbled something quietly. Though it was too low to understand, Strand quickly convinced himself that she must want him to stay with her, but if he was being completely honest with himself, he would have taken any excuse to stay. As delicately as possible, so as to not wake Alex, he wrangled his body onto the floor and sat next to the bed. 

As he stared at her from his perch on the floor, Strand too quickly surrendered to the immense exhaustion of the day and fell asleep with his head coming to gently rest next to Alex’s on the edge of the bed and their hands still firmly clasped together.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "Open your Eyes" by Snow Patrol


End file.
